At this point, the “2pm announcement” could just as easily be: - Stepping down for health - Abolishing the Post Office - We’re bombing Legoland - No more Ranch Dressing, gays!
Emmy-winning comedy/animation writer (Daily Show, CONAN, Teen Titans Go!), NYT-bestselling author (Look Out For the Little Guy), mediocre bass player.
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At this point, the “2pm announcement” could just as easily be: - Stepping down for health - Abolishing the Post Office - We’re bombing Legoland - No more Ranch Dressing, gays!
And today’s award for “Most Crushingly Anticlimactic Headline” goes to…
Trouble on the set of “CAPTAIN AMERICA: REVOLUTIONARY WAR”
How can anyone be this angry, who gets to come to work every day in a bathing suit?
“Yes, I’d like to report an act of hate speech…”
And lo, a new hero arose…
Infallible Strangers
Friends, we got a call to action 👇 We have the right to know when and how our creative works are used, especially when it comes to GenAi! This is why we need regulation like California’s Ai Copyright Transparency Act #AB-412 ! If you agree, especially if in CA, please sign & share this petition!
Episode 4 of this season’s SNW puts the holodeck far into the future.
It’s astonishing that the nearly-50-year-old, trillion-dollar-yielding Star Wars franchise’s entire cred was nearly derailed by the single word “Somehow.”
Nah there’s too many plotlines for any character to have their name said thrice per episode.
And not MITCHELL???
Is there ANYTHING this guy can’t do?
Minivan Halen
Slightly Hurry
Don’t share this
Just when you thought the current timeline couldn’t get any more terrifying:
I’ve seen STAR WARS and COMING TO AMERICA like a million times each. But only yesterday did I finally pick up on this…
“You can’t do comedy anymore” — to SRO crowd at Madison Square Garden.
“2025 - it’s all in the mind”
“…unless we get unexpectedly Snapped by Thanos”
ATTENTION COMEDY LISTENERS My brilliant(ly twisted) pal @mikebsacks.bsky.social has another hilarious banger of a scripted podcast out, with a MURDERER’S ROW of talent! Check it out here: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/s...
ATTENTION ALCOHOLICS
THE GILDED AGE straight-up switching to a reality-elimination show.
Find someone who wants you the way Duolingo wants you to upgrade to Super.
weeklyhumorist.com/supporter-up...
Rob Eshman has a great rubric for all this where he redirects such disputes into “What future do you want to see?”
“I just wanted to be on the overpriced dome!”
This is THE essential pack to follow to lighten your spirits in these heavy times. Despite the fact that I’m in it.
GILDED AGE trigger warning!
I appreciate the character deepening, but ngl: I miss when Oscar used to be more “fun.”
I don’t know if there’s another precedent for “spinoff product SO much better than source material.” With the possible exception of this: www.ebay.com/p/1032529851
LIT
Hi! Just met you at margaritaville (Deadpool guy)
ULTRA RADNESS— 5x Emmy-winner (and 2x Stunt Lister) @robkutner.bsky.social reppin’ his project on The Stunt List’s new ‘cinema-ready’ indie comic showcase SPLASH PAGE at the legendary San Diego Comic Con! LFGO! Be sure to check out his rad Deadpool book coming out soon! #scriptsky #sdcc
Umm, NY times, maybe put a third item between these?
LISTEN TO ASH… or TASTE MY KATANA!
Looking for inspiration on this dark timeline? I got you covered:
So stoked to have “made the list.” And check out all the other rad titles as well! bsky.app/profile/ashl...
New Pixar movie just dropped
Return to Al Capone’s Vault!
Sign this petition, which is growing exponentially, to tell CBS/Paramount to reverse its chilling Colbert decision. act.boldprogressives.org/survey/petit...
The technical term is “Chumbotron.”
Nicest guy in showbiz
Beyond the politics, axing the #1 late-night show for a merger is more of the insane, hedge-fund-driven mania that decimated Hollywood, is crushing one of America’s most unique industries/ soft influence, and will mean even more reboots and sequels. But some billionaires will have a great quarter!
As a CONAN/Lenogate writer, I now sadly concede the title of “Worst Late-Night Cancellation.”
COMIC-CONNERS come see me at this super-fun podcast/panel
Or fetuses
Let it Grow…
This Epstein rift is shocking - the first time MAGA-ites have given half a shit about the well-being of children.
At this point, shouldn’t he be switching over to “Thank you for your NON-attention to this matter?”
Get it here: Get it here: www.hachettebookgroup.com/titles/david...
Just got, and devoured, my genius friend/collaborator David DeGrand’s new book, and it is not only brilliantly original, hilarious, and eye-poppingly drawn - it is the PERFECT BOOK FOR THIS MOMENT. Read it with or without your kids, it will stick with you!
I’ve started a fan club for the Puerto Rican Jewish character on “Welcome Back Kotter,” and I’m calling it THE EPSTEIN-PHILES Who wants to add their name?
Going to make way more $ with my SUPERMAN reboot, where he’s born in Kansas, his weakness is “unflattering books about the Confederacy,” and he uses his superpowers to defeat a drag story hour.
Just watched this hilarious special on such a shit day, and it transformed it into a mere “kaka day!”
I want to see Julian Fellowes do an MCU “Civil War” thing where the Russells and Van Rhijns team up to fight the Crawleys at Kitty Hawk.
Many disagree about cause/solution. Refocus.
George Russell’s robber baron rep undercut when it’s discovered he’s been sheltering a family of immigrants in his beard
Jack’s clock turned into a time bomb used to assassinate President Garfield.
Sounds like a dangerous night
“Sourdough before 9pm? What are we, SAVAGES???”
Forget Baby - no one puts LISA HOUSEMAN in a corner! New ep of @novelizers.bsky.social has Jane Brucker, who played the “hula hana” big sister in DIRTY DANCING, and her rebuttal! Check it out, and the rest of our Dirty Dancing season: podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/t... novelizers.bsky.social
Also in Wirecutter: Our Top 10 Reccs for Guillotines!
“I’ll sacrifice other humans to take down my ideological target” is why we have Trump - from BOTH left and right wingers!
And here I thought the hardest thing on earth was getting *out* of Dodger Stadium.
*Someone’s* not a fan of origin stories…
So, per South Park, Conan has spent the past 25 years in hell?
“On tonight’s HIJABBED SINGER…”
During Covid, I was like, “Hey, that’s pretty nice of Bill Gates to give me free 5G!”
“I have a set of very particular skills, skills I’ve obtained over a long career…”
A QUIET PLACE (2018, Dir: J. Krasinski)
I went to a classic car parade in an Atlanta suburb that was more of a rager.
NOT TODAY, DROPBOX Read the room!
“Ye@h bUt 1srAel BAD!” - 1 million responses inbound
AKSHUALLY if you don’t care about Easter eggs, it’s completely self-explanatory and standalone (and very well done). I sometimes forget it’s even Star Wars, and then like every 3 episodes someone says “Palpatine.”
I have a joke about Hephaestus but it’s kinda lame.
I have a joke about Proteas… actually now it’s a riddle… and now it’s a limerick.
I have a joke about Penelope and her husband… wait for it…
I have an inside joke about the Trojan Horse.
I have a soft spot for jokes about Achilles.
I had a joke about Orpheus that I still look back on.
Check out this EPIC COMEDY CROSSOVER between @jordanjessego.bsky.social and @novelizers.bsky.social !
When literally the only thing keeping us from slipping into despair is “Brian Wilson being a hilarious dick” stories.
Maybe not the *best* messaging for a recording studio?
Just like the famous Victor Frankl book, “Man’s Search for Clout.”
New Yorker cartoon attempt by Jose Arroyo et moi:
“Yes, I’d like to withdraw everything please?”
As an Angeleno, this has not not been a great weekend to be watching Season 2 of Andor…
Abbum
Well what else is new…
Not sure why Wes Anderson bothers scoring his films, since every scene’s music could just be “Deedle-deedle-dee, deedle-deedle-dee, deedledeedledeedle deedle deedle-deedle-dee.” [key change and repeat]
Maybe my Innie understands S2 of Severance?
ASD folks/ friends and family and advocates: what did yall think of The Rehearsal S2’s take?
He also expressed surprise that pumpkin spice wasn’t available year round, and asked when “hot girl autumn” is.
Jewish American here - absolutely, this threatens all of us the same.
Jodi Ernst, from the GOP’s powerful new Goth Caucus.
I’ve heard of “vagina dentata,” but…
