in high school I worked at a cold stone creamery and one of the songs we had to sing was a parody of Rockin’ Robin called “Mixin’ Mix-Ins” that still comes to me unbidden like a memory of war
just here to have fun online
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in high school I worked at a cold stone creamery and one of the songs we had to sing was a parody of Rockin’ Robin called “Mixin’ Mix-Ins” that still comes to me unbidden like a memory of war
I meant to say comparison. read this in his voice too
I can’t imagine a nicer competition
drowning bucket
NO
I fucking hope not. this is how I provide for my family
may it live forever in your brain
long day working at the vats where we grow grinch candidates for christmas. they kill the old one in january as a sort of sin-eater thing so we get started around september to make sure we have a few viable grinches. the habitat where we harvest wild grinch sperm is shrinking due to climate change
I thank god I’m able to say no
how dare you
that’s right
that’ll be $100
yeah singing for tips was a big part of it
I was that theatre kid
We pound on the cold stone All day long Mixin’ and a-choppin’ And a-singin’ this song All the little kids come to see us play ‘Cause they all love our Cold Stone way Mixin’ Mix-Ins (Treat! Treat! Treat!)
in high school I worked at a cold stone creamery and one of the songs we had to sing was a parody of Rockin’ Robin called “Mixin’ Mix-Ins” that still comes to me unbidden like a memory of war
dude you should check out hackey sacks
it’s on the list
bsky.app/profile/ceej...
my wife is making sauce every day to freeze. it’s how we survive the winter
nooo
we’re pulling at least five pounds of tomatoes out of the garden every day. it rules
folks, we’re swimmin’ in ‘em
if trump is healthy then how come he looks like that
this dude who I have never interacted with quoted one of my posts that did not reference him in any way and used it to insinuate that I was "anti-intellectual" and "authoritarian" for no reason other than because he likes to pick fights online with strangers. crocodile tears
if your whole deal is quoteposting all day to send your pack of rabid fanboys into the mentions of smaller accounts because you have mistaken posting online for political organizing I don't actually think you get to complain about bullies
thank you for coming to my big announcement that was planned for weeks and not thrown together at the last second to get ahead of speculation that my health is in decline. alabama (taking a huge huff of a mysterious gas like dennis hopper in blue velvet) is in charge of space
gutter slime (derogatory)
PERSON WHO EXCLUSIVELY HANGS OUT WITH GUTTER SLIME: You guys are annoying
nazis
agree
I mean equally likely he got an ingrown toenail and it sent him spiraling
I think he actually fears physical decline. I think it’s the only thing that actually scares him
again it’s a million to one odds that it’s anything, but trump musing about death last week is the thing sticking in my craw. dude didn’t think about dying this much after almost getting assassinated. is he the type of guy to make “three months to live” announcement? I don’t know
the enemy
teaching my children that in the event they become lost they can trust any adult with a tattoo of a hot dog
then you won’t have them anymore. you see the issue
okay, but they’re *your* chains. and you’re just going to lose them?
look, I get that there’s a certain amount of catharsis in seeing a political candidate stand up and name oligarchy and capitalism as prime evils worth defeating. but running these candidates is a slippery slope to awakening class consciousness in the american electorate
I think basically zero
a friend of mine worked on this show and reported to me that he’s just like that
I honestly do not think they’d tell him
every single one of us expending the vast sum of our collective energy hoping that beyond all realistic possibility we find out tomorrow trump is somehow secretly dead still amounts to a fraction of a fraction of a percentage of the amount that vance is praying for the same
“I have defeated death itself”
he’s announcing a 12th lesson
As somewhat of a political wunderkind, the Democrats should ignore the people who make fun of me and think I suck shit generally. It doesn’t bother me that they do that by the way. I could be right about stuff if I wanted
the baby has stolen something but doesn’t have the language skills to tell me where she put it. this is bullshit. she’s laughing at me
pretty obvious taxidermy
ALL THESE APPS ARE YOURS, EXCEPT BLUESKY. ATTEMPT NO POSTING THERE.
“the science is settled!” yeah, by scientists who drink water…
I’m a hydration skeptic. not sure you need to drink that stuff
we’re married
thanks for being so patient with me. I’ll get to that thing about your brother and the troll just as soon as I master blacksmithing. next year probably
erection you retract like a tape measure
“did you ever hear of 9/11? that was me. do they call you ‘sex workers’ now? back in my day — aiyeeeee!!”
lots of questions remain about giuliani’s accident, of course, but one thing of which we can be absolutely certain is that he was butt dialing a reporter at the time
it just didn’t feel good to have the two most prominent actors of color be monsters
yeah possibly. honestly as an american it felt like there was a lot of Britishness going right over my head
glad you’re alright my dude
was the movie maybe incredibly racist though maybe
ohhhhh
I’m down for the hallucinogenic sweatiness but it would have been better if they put scary parts in it. Glad they got all that dong in there at least
28 Years Later was a trip but all things considered I think they should have made it even a little bit scary
haven’t looked into it too closely yet but I was heartened to see the google trends report indicate the hiking community showing so much interest in my recipe for Gross Old Rancid Piss
no, those aren’t Guys
*gently to my cat*: you cant be a little fucker. You have to be good. No more being a little fucker. *My cat, purring*: the Being a Fucker hour draws near
good bye
yeah anyone can be a Guy
oh you gotta get a Bee Guy
not having easy access to Guys has forced me to become a tiny plumbing Guy, light electrical Guy, CAD and 3D printing Guy, computer and networking Guy, garden Guy, and Guy who has a bunch of random tools. I am ready to take my place in the Guy Economy
lol
it’s like, guy 1 repairs guy 2’s porch for $50 and gets to keep the leftover lumber that he trades to guy 3 for a new fender and a discount on a junker that he repairs with the help of guy 4, who is happy to teach guy 1 what he knows about engines for a six pack of coors and a ride to the airport
I’ve had to become many guys in one just waiting for the day I can offload some of my guy duties to other guys
preach
critically: it’s just as important to know a guy as it is to be a guy that someone else knows
bsky.app/profile/ceej...
my father-in-law is a “I know a guy” Guy. sadly all the old Guys are aging out of the Guy Economy. Guys are fundamentally incompatible with Hustle Culture because it’s not about “winning” a deal, it’s about collecting favors and goodwill in a mutually-beneficial cycle. protect your local Guy Economy
that’s just what they want you to think
RIP king
BBL
my take is trump had some routine but semi-risky surgery planned so he could recover in secret over the holiday and that’s why he’s been thinking about dying and also why vance let slip he’s planning to take over some day and why his cabinet had a three hour love-in this week
when he shows up on tuesday with a jaw implant it’s going to be so annoying that we have to pretend it’s natural
get a cite of this juicy ass
that’s what you see when you’re going to hell
one cool thing about me is I’m definitely alive
Fairly fucking disgusting to see so many on the “left” fantasize about a man’s death just because he’s trying to take a vacation. “Workers’ rights for me but not for thee” I guess
#vancecoup
eric
this is mostly a joke but it’s also true that this one just doesn’t have that trump je nais se quois. not his voice
JD Vance must immediately produce evidence that President Trump is still alive! True MAGA patriots will never accept the #vancecoup! Please like and share to send a message to the RINOs in Washington: no Vance coup!
no exclamation point at the end. that’s not him
that’s not his voice. I can tell
the greatest thread in the history of The Forum, gates locked by the guards after four hundred days of public debate,
if he were alive how come he’s not on tv
it doesn’t matter to my brain that trump is the laziest guy on the planet who hates working and wants to spend all day watching tv. whenever he disappears for more than twelve hours I’m convinced he’s dead
alternatively listen to the Jehnny Beth album that also came out today which rips and does not sound very much like Clairo
I was never a true antonoff hater but the dude has had a lazy few years at the board
I think the album is alright except for the thick layer of jack antonoff's new house style dragging everything down. everybody sounds like clairo now
agree with everyone that the sabrina carpenter album cover is incredibly problematic. she's not doing any carpentry
