not a single fucking beanie baby ever wore a beanie i'm fucken OUTRAGED
Good intentions, questionable methods. The Mother of Dad Jokes™️. Recovering academic turned shitposter 🇵🇸 (they/she)🏳️🌈 avi 🎨 by @geraldinepiche.bsky.social Garbáge 🗣️ bsky.app/profile/did:plc:7bv2ca3yawj662o7qxd5xyt7/feed/aaalmvj26kmvy
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not a single fucking beanie baby ever wore a beanie i'm fucken OUTRAGED
did you know you can crush eggshells to make plant food or that you can set yourself on fire
happy labor day everyone. now more than ever we got to remember what it's about.
Big popular accounts add alt text to you screenshots challenge (impossible).
I think 182 year old research articles should be free I want to read about the man
keep all my homies’ info in a brolladex
💯
Scientology? Yeah. All of it. But from what I hear Cathy is alive and still getting the royal treatment. It’s the grunts and lower level servants that have no freedom or safe ways to leave we should be even more worried about imo 😕
Their niece who escaped when she was like 22 says there are reports she’s alive and doing fine. She goes to appointments and lays low. Who knows 🤷🏻♀️
knock-knock-knockin on heaven’s door as i light the bag of poo and run away giggling
Every year 🍿
my sister googled "fun things to do in Boston this weekend" and it told her to go sit on Storrow Drive and watch a bunch of college kids peel their rented Penske moving trucks open like tin cans
This one was a bit niche for a dad joke maybe but I am glad someone appreciates
*busy frosting a urinal cake for your birthday*
Some people are just facebook funny and you know exactly what I mean by that
they should broadcast the different celebrations around the world like they do on new year's eve when it happens
Yes I absolutely fell into a rabbit hole of Scientology videos instead of doing what I should be doing but at least my avoidance felt productive
The fact that the courts continue to uphold the enforceability of Scientology’s arbitration agreements is a complete sham and a total Miscavige of justice
[sneeze one] bless you [sneeze two] bless you [sneeze three] you are under arrest
gravy starburst
rip to everyone whos become delusional after talking to chatgpt but im built different. like actually different. according to chatgpt im some kind of god. the one who decides
Actually, Frankenstein is a doctor success at the Venice film festival
annual reminder
feel like slim and fat chance should be a different amount of chance
waitress asks me how my food is "Do you really care or are you just trying to distract me from the epstein files"
i call my boyfriends “contempt” & “board” cuz sometimes im beneath contempt & other times im above board heyoooooooo
Refuse to be called woke by someone who talks like a Harry Potter side character having a stroke. “Noshing on a poncy porous plimsoll?” Go to a hospital.
I guess I'm guilty, if caring too much about taking things that don't belong to me is a crime.
thank you for your feedback 30 internet strangers i hadn't considered the less funny version of my joke
Video appeals 46-year-old conviction for killing The Radio Star, argues that The Radio Star is alive and well and living under assumed name of The Podcaster.
ME: Whoa unique horn HORSE WITH A HORN: Thanks- wait say that again
finally thought of a comeback to something said 20 years ago
Hello 911?
What if House of Leaves was cute?! 🤔
future historians are going to have a tough job combing through the Posting Archives to figure out the politics of our era
The death of old Twitter and the loss of so many threads and interactions as people deleted their accounts is honestly a catastrophe for history.
Right. New Hampshire isn’t listed or pictured in the highlighted states. That’s why my response is what it is. Do you know what NH’s state motto is?
😂🔥💯
One of lifes scariest moments is when a woman calmly says "wow" during an argument
These white blossoms turn pink over time from absorbing earth shrimp
what's the rule? no white people after Labor Day?
The pins and needles from the rush of blood back to your legs is your reminder that you’re still alive after doomscrolling on the toilet
I love a thrill... like when you hold down backspace and it starts erasing like 10x faster fuck
Can’t stop thinking about my neighbor’s garage door
Right? 😅
😂🥲🫶
This post really wasn’t meant to hate on the entirety of NH, honestly. I have family up there and it’s a beautiful state. It just clearly has its downsides too 😅
😂🔥💯
Smart move 😅
😭💯
agree with everyone that the sabrina carpenter album cover is incredibly problematic. she's not doing any carpentry
😏
Truly felt I had no choice. I hope I do not miss out on any big citrus news
No one is less confused than a woman in a disagreement who says “I guess I’m just a little confused” btw. RUN
I love NH but they do be weird like that
I love NH, but they do be like this
… tf are you talking about
“Ego Death at the Verizon Store” is a song that Lana Del Rey should write
I always thought it must suck to be in prison in NH. Ironically, they’re probably the ones stamping the state license plates 😭
only you can prevent pants on fire
WIFE: what is another word for literal ME: no it isn't
tried out THE FLY telepods but a secret turkey was in there, now I can’t type
Them: “Cities are all rotting hellscapes!” Cities:
I see New Hampshire is looking to live free and die then 😅
Since social media is terrible now, I mainly go online to argue with Australians about what day it is.
The NRA buys off Congress. No action on guns. The oil industry buys off Congress. No action on climate. Insurance companies buy off Congress. No action on health care. The list goes on and on. Money in politics is the root of our dysfunction.
☺️🫶🫵
LOL wut 🤣
this site is bad! it's going to fail! its user base has plateaued! it's not making any money! nobody here is smart except for me! everybody here is stupid! nobody is having any good discussions! i don't like being here! ok that's it for now. be back in 90 minutes
🥹🥲 the utmost compliment
🥲
Ruining my own rep 😎
😉🤷🏻♀️😘
By “met” I mean had genuinely kind, thoughtful, and/or funny interactions with that made the day a little brighter. It counts in my book
Not to be TOO mushy but I’ve met a bunch of rad people on here that I really appreciate is all
je ne sais queef
In America we have city cops, different cops for your county, cops for the whole state, cops for soldiers, cops for malls, presidential cops, cops for the stock market, mail cops, federal cops, cops we secretly send to other countries. Even your neighbors get to pretend to be cops. We’re very safe
gumption is one of the more disgusting sounding characteristics
I probably shouldn't put it this way, but uh the "hide reply for everyone" button feels great to press. You decide what your posts are a platform for
I just haven’t heard it in a minute. I’m sure it would immediately activate ☺️
Don’t really appreciate your tone
Then ask “can you read this and tell me if you think it will pass?” C’MON
OMG I used to have such a voice crush on him. So true
You remembered 🥲😭💓
I was really confused by the KMFDM thing too but then looked it up and saw the columbine thing and it tracks. Eeesh
It takes a certain amount of abnormality to shitpost
It’s pretty striking to me that by scrolling Bluesky’s “Popular With Friends” tab for a few minutes I can get up to speed quickly with the breaking news of the day but if I were to just scroll X’s “For You” page for the same amount of time (or more) I wouldn’t even know there was a school shooting
It’s absolutely wild that asking for what you want directly and saying what you actually mean is “divergent” from social standards and neurodivergent people are the weird atypical ones for not playing or adjusting to the hidden layer of “guess what I really mean” in social interactions. That’s all
all i wanna do is eat everything all the time, never exercise, and be in great shape is that too much to ask
?
Well-behaved sandwiches rarely make history
imagine being so maniacally racist that you side with the fire over the firefighter
whoever named them missiles wasn't very optimistic
It’s also cultural, societal, personality, and context or relationship dependent. but I am talking about a general trend and key difference in communication styles that is a well known difference in communication styles between allistic and ND people here
Communication is a key difference between neurotypical and neurodivergent. I am not looking to capture all the nuance or exceptions or outliers here. I am talking about this topic in the realm of neurodivergent people in this post
RIGHT??!