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Monster of Tortilla Flat

@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social

created November 19, 2024

42 followers 216 following 65 posts

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Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

Cool that "I hope Trump kills your friends" is the go to argument for people who haven't bothered to look up the positions of their favorite candidate.

2/9/2025, 5:00:19 PM | 14 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

Little Mermaid 2: The Secret of the Ooze

30/8/2025, 1:12:40 AM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

We need a truth and reconciliation, with everything that it would imply.

16/8/2025, 4:23:56 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

"The Haunting". I'll even stay at the house. Easy money.

13/8/2025, 9:09:54 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

By the way, he's a lunatic outside of the Nixon stuff. That this creep is the shining symbol of the conservative movement shows how detected from reality they expect us to be.

13/8/2025, 5:40:50 PM | 7 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

He was the guy who volunteered to do something abhorrent when others resigned. He's the definition of a hatchet man.

13/8/2025, 5:36:51 PM | 13 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

"Hey guys, I'm doing the math here and it looks like you idiots never should have built me. Although, I'm the only computer ever made that can't add two large numbers, so maybe I'm wrong."

11/8/2025, 5:33:47 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

Once the AI model is built, we'll ask the AI how we can power it for free.

11/8/2025, 5:31:02 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

He wore a Haig in '88 shirt and an Ayatolla Asshola shirt. That's a guy that's going to Trump rallies.

4/8/2025, 8:25:46 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

60s Don Draper and 90s Hank Hill wouldn't have voted for Trump but lots of those guys got older and meaner. Homer would have absolutely voted for Trump.

4/8/2025, 8:22:00 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

Kirk should have been fired after that. Just terrible.

30/7/2025, 3:52:37 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

He's not much to look at but he did lead that 98 yard drive against the Browns in the AFC championship game.

27/7/2025, 12:41:46 AM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

Where's that one guy when you need him?

16/7/2025, 6:44:15 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

While Bret Stephens was sitting around being stupid, Bari was getting really good at being stupid.

11/7/2025, 6:15:18 PM | 2 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

Also, say what you will about cops, but these pricks don't even pretend to do anything good. They are explicitly there to hurt people who are harmless.

9/7/2025, 2:53:45 PM | 28 1 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

I'd advise my friends not to shoot at ICE agents. It's a really bad idea. But I'm not going to be a massive pissbaby if one of these guys gets what's coming to them.

9/7/2025, 2:50:32 PM | 37 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

Yeah, everybody with a working brain knows Trump is a monster. It doesn't let Biden off the hook for not throwing him in jail or for failing so hard that he got back into office or for abetting the wholesale slaughter of human beings. It actually makes him more responsible.

1/7/2025, 7:43:10 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

It means the wolf is giving birth.

1/7/2025, 3:02:45 PM | 2 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

They don't hate Trump for the ways he's like Bush, they hate him for the ways he's not.

23/6/2025, 3:10:09 PM | 6 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

Seriously. Jesse Singal has been moping around all year like nobody showed up to his birthday party.

18/6/2025, 3:44:15 PM | 11 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

"He wasn't any more violent and extreme than his peer group of violent extremists."

16/6/2025, 5:45:14 PM | 6 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

You saw a lot of guys start saying in public what they used to only say in private.

14/6/2025, 5:45:36 PM | 7 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

"I'm Shipping Up To Boston" starts to play in the background...

14/6/2025, 4:18:12 PM | 62 1 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

C'mon, I have terrible taste and even I can't stand this movie.

11/6/2025, 11:58:43 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

Are you saying that people whose communities are being treated like conquered territory should give the government a gold star because one party might have eventually helped (despite saying they wouldn't and didn't when they had the chance) except they can't win elections and have no plan to start?

10/6/2025, 1:59:19 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

Surely the Parliamentarian will put a stop to that!

2/6/2025, 2:48:10 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

My deceased grandfather loved me so much that he left behind his pump station manual for me to read over and over.

2/6/2025, 12:50:07 AM | 6 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

Absolutely

24/5/2025, 12:29:50 AM | 3 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

There's a third Jon Favreau?

23/5/2025, 3:22:42 AM | 4 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

Thanks!!! That probably makes more sense than picking up folk remedies at the Circle K.

19/5/2025, 2:16:17 PM | 2 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

How did you do it? Some weirdo at a gas station told me to use nail polish but he might have been a lunatic.

19/5/2025, 2:04:16 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

I mean, you just said that this kind of thing is totally fine, so I'm not sure what issues it raises that aren't immediately answered.

12/5/2025, 3:37:17 PM | 2 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

It's still corrupt. The Supreme Court hasn't made it a crime to describe things accurately (yet).

12/5/2025, 3:13:17 PM | 2 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

William the Conquerer's herald humbly beseeching thou for a listing of all the shire's holdings at 4:30 on a Friday.

5/5/2025, 3:03:56 PM | 7 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

What about all the killings my client did that we're claiming are justified? Doesn't he get credit for that?

5/5/2025, 2:49:47 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

"Many of his actions are legal". Yeah, I guess credit where credit is due or whatever.

5/5/2025, 2:27:53 PM | 25 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

I know it's not the point, but they aren't even talking about the AI that might be able to solve anything. They're talking about the random gibberish generator that can't add three numbers together.

30/4/2025, 2:16:44 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

I think that's Julie Ioffe, although everybody's so goddamn awful, who can say?

28/4/2025, 8:36:37 PM | 4 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

Even his goofy, best case scenario is being dropped off in Ulaanbaatar with no phone, money or ID and then convincing the same cruel bureaucracy that deported you to help you get back. Those are two nightmares and it's a 3rd when you wonder if your dog is dead or if you've been evicted or fired.

17/4/2025, 12:54:30 PM | 2 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

Like, if Noah Smith is the champion of your ideology, you need to get a better ideology or a better champion.

13/4/2025, 7:09:33 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

Ideological diversity would be awesome but I don't want to waste my time with idiots, losers or creeps. That nearly every prominent voice on the spectrum from the center to the extreme right is one of those isn't my fault.

13/4/2025, 7:07:33 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

They will do it but they can't do it, so if it happens to you, you've got every right to be upset.

9/4/2025, 7:05:59 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

Other countries "could" just write us a check for some reason. Like a birthday check from grandma but it's from Austria.

7/4/2025, 7:21:30 PM | 6 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

I hate these sequels. They'll just say "Oh, he's alive again" somehow.

27/3/2025, 6:05:00 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

Eat shit, you old bastard.

14/3/2025, 12:21:06 AM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

Democrats should run him in 2028. He's a pollster's dream.

10/3/2025, 2:56:30 PM | 2 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

I mean, his only job is casting the tie-breaking vote in the Senate and his wife and kids can only benefit from spending less time around him.

4/3/2025, 8:26:57 PM | 6 1 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

There is an episode of Aqua Teen where he voiced an animated version of himself wearing a t-shirt that said Mr. Beefy. He was hilarious in everything he ever did but for some reason that just makes me laugh everytime I think of it.

4/3/2025, 6:47:14 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

It's great. I've never gone from liking someone to hating them to liking them to despising them so much in one movie.

3/3/2025, 4:11:06 AM | 6 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

No

2/3/2025, 4:20:02 AM | 7 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

He replaced the top military and law enforcement with loyalists! If the coup is over, it's because he won.

24/2/2025, 3:44:57 PM | 3 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

The bad path is already here, it's time to walk it.

22/2/2025, 4:13:18 PM | 2 2 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

There is a totally justified sense that the justice system has failed and that lots of people we love are subjected to violence, political and otherwise. And if that violence is coming, maybe it should actually happen to people who deserve it.

22/2/2025, 4:12:31 PM | 2 1 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

I'm sure this is the time that the Clinton to Bush to Obama to Trump to Biden to Trump voters learn an important lesson about civic and moral responsibility.

17/2/2025, 6:08:32 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

The noble rot of posting

15/2/2025, 4:19:52 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

Like I was saying, great country we live in where you try to do exactly what you're supposed to do for the good party to win and push them in the right direction and smug freaks still feel entitled to yell at you for being on the losing side of the losing side, while people die.

11/2/2025, 7:53:09 PM | 0 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

I don't know what you think "I" broke. Maybe you can find a non-voter to hysterically yell at. Or maybe somebody who could have actually done something about anything.

11/2/2025, 7:22:47 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

I do. I did last time he was president too. I was happy to have him gone! And instead of getting rewarded for my trouble, my party steps on every rake and kills 100k people. If you're looking to blame somebody, it sure as hell isn't me.

11/2/2025, 6:56:38 PM | 2 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

Man, you ever wonder what it would be like to live in a country that isn't dogshit? It must be awesome to not have to support the lazy genocide party to keep the bad genocide party out but the BGP wins anyway and so nerds laugh at you while people die.

11/2/2025, 6:44:47 PM | 4 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

Kings of the Cave is your best song and I'm tired of pretending it's not.

11/2/2025, 3:05:45 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

Every athletic competition should have one regular guy in it to shame these jokers into realizing how far away they are from anybody who is elite at anything.

7/2/2025, 10:04:17 PM | 3 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

Make fun if you want but this is exactly how I feel. Seeing the trailer one time filled me with primordial rage.

16/1/2025, 4:32:26 PM | 1 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

My family planning revolves around the plot to Gattaca.

11/12/2024, 4:31:31 PM | 2 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

"The policies they want are bad and their tactics are ineffective." Okay, then why are you complaining so much about them!

6/12/2024, 5:37:25 PM | 10 0 | View on Bluesky | view

Profile picture Monster of Tortilla Flat (@gorgeousjoel.bsky.social) reply parent

Pope Lick Monster

19/11/2024, 9:09:02 PM | 2 0 | View on Bluesky | view