That face you make when you learn the winner's name is Alcaraz and not Alcatraz.
If the bear needs poking, I'm your huckleberry.
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That face you make when you learn the winner's name is Alcaraz and not Alcatraz.
Price of coffee about to go up.
He made that face when he learned Carlos' last name wasn't Alcatraz.
This Trump as an FBI CI story is totally legit. He was registered under his street name, Fuzzy Dunlop.
Hanks should have done a movie showing the valient 4Fs and their crucial role in victory. So unfair. Always focusing on the suckers and losers that fought. Always forgetting those with the courage to stay behind. Thank you for your attention to this matter.
That whirling sound you hear is Katharine Graham spinning in her grave.
Mike needs to take one of those "Person, Woman,Man, Camera, TV" tests.
I grew up thinking CBS stood for Columbia Broadcasting System. Who would have thought it stood for Complete Bull Shit.
Math is so Woke.
State workers are apparently removing chalk memorials as soon as they go up at the Orlando crosswalk by the Pulse nightclub. Some artist should put one of these up, so we can watch MAGA heads explode as they decide whether to purge the rainbow or keep Daddy Trump.
Some needs to do the work. The regular landscapers were deported.
Sure, he gets Noel and Liam back together. Come on, if there's anyone we should have sent the B-2s after.
Just waiting for the EO banning mail-in HOF ballots.
If I threw a pierogi at Dershowitz, do you think they could indict me?
Cures Depression, Covid, Small Pox, Consumption and The Vapors
Please question Sec Kennedy about his family's financial interest in discrediting vaccines.
BREAKING: The DOJ announced that, in keeping with the judge's order, Abrego Garcia will be moved to a new floating detention facility located 75 miles east of Cape May, NJ. "We affirm our commitment to the rule of law," Pam Bondi said, "We are proud to open Shark Alcatraz for situation like this."
Greenland should probably detain those folks conducting covert operations, and deported then to somewhere like....I don't know...Uganda?
If he's settling scores, he needs to take out this guy. I've seen the movie. He's working with Barzini.
The article states "The reason Shin was detained remains unknown." I'm going to go out on a limb here and guess the reason is he's not white.
You have to admit, summer is a tough time of year to be a snowflake in Baltimore.
Progressive friends are upset Cracker Barrel caved on the logo, but the old logo is the "Woke" one. It's far more inclusive. You don't need to understand English, or even read to know what it says. Everything is right there in the pictogram of a cracker sitting next to a barrel.
Just surprised Trump didn't follow Putin's advice to treat US Covid with polonium-210.
That's just the kind of thing an AI-generated Melania deepfake would say.
I often wonder what historical figures would think of current events, so I ask an AI: What would our original Secretary of War Henry Knox think of President Trump's plan to change the name of the Defense Department back to the War Department? I was a little surprised at his reply.
Many more wanted to attend, but most of the space was needed for Cuomo's ego.
Friday "To Do" list: 1. Persecute critics 2. Purge military 3. Seize the means of production
6 out of 10 Republicans welcome the fall of democracy.
Only the military needs sandwiches with high capacity French rolls.
Spoiler Alert: Agents did not find the Epstein files.
Unfortunately, it's more likely Trump wants extra staff to go after the 503C status of non-profits he thinks are woke, and to conduct audits of Democrats in Congress.
With the geniuses formulating our border policies, I'm a little surprised that their idea isn't to put "Welcome to Guatemala" on the wall to make migrants think they went the wrong way.
Yep, found the problem. The new logo no longer features a cracker sitting next to a barrel.
Another dangerous assault sandwiches off the street. I'll sleep better tonight.
Wait...wut? It's Zelensky's fault? I thought it Biden's fault.
Wonder what Vlad thought about the filet being served with a side of ketchup.
What did you expect? ICE is just supposed to stand by and watch the delivery of sandwiches that they will be used against them later? These delivery drivers are facilitating the sale of dangerous assault sandwiches and must be stopped.
Trump lookjng like Pete Hegseth at a DUI checkpoint.
Trump may get that Nobel after all.
DOJ should probably offer a plea dill.
100% of pedophiles approve, however, so Trump does have that going for him.
Everyone is downplaying the sandwich attack, but this happened in DC folks. That makes it a Capitol offense.
It takes a real alpha male to stand up to the brutality of a sandwich attack. We can only hope Officer Jimmy Johns gets the Medal of Valor for his heroism.
BREAKING -- This year's honors go to huge, huge stars Kevin Sorbo, Dean Cain and Scott Baio. "There's never been such a bigly collection of stars ever in the history world," said Trump, "and they all love me, because no one recognizes talent like Trump, I mean I should get a Nobel Prize for that."
Any settlement that rewards Putin for his war of aggression is reprehensible.
Maybe someone should spread the rumor that the Deep State is trying to keep the public from the health benefits of drinking and bathing in the Yellowstone hot springs. Darwin may be the key to defeating MAGA.
Suddenly, JD's name appears in Sharpie all over the files.
I sense an executive order being drafted.
Maybe ICE can give Chachi a job too. DEI for washed up actors.
Epstein files are stored securely with the rest of the classified documents -- in the Mar A Lago bathroom.
Yelling at SS agents below: You kids get off of my lawn!!!!
How many Sharpies will it take to cross out all Trump references and write in Biden?
There's got to be a simple explanation, like a cyborg Joe Biden hacked his computer and uploaded images from Hunter's laptop.
They will go with him 100% if Maxwell spins a yarn about how Trump is innocent, but Clinton, Obama or Biden is a child molester. It's what they've wanted to hear for years, and they will buy it without any evidence or corroboration.
Martians being deported to Neptune, because Stephen Miller wants to teach them a lesson.
Trump is basically Nixon, without the skills in foreign policy...or domestic policy....or really any skills whatsoever.
Don't give him any ideas. We'll go from billionaires not paying taxes, to the Treasury Dept cutting them big fat bonus checks.
"Numbers that are not thought to be achievable." Particularly by mathematicians.
BREAKING -- Opera House name change will be accompanied by a format change and extensive remodeling. When asked about the remodel, the President said, "Now these are kind of poles I can get behind."
BREAKING -- In response to the CBS YouGov poll showing Americans want the Epstein files, Paramount has fired the American public.
They laughed at me and made jokes, but I proved beyond the shadow of a doubt, and with geometric logic, that Obama did create the Epstein files in order to frame me.
He should consider getting a place at Mar A Lago, where sexual harassment is thought if as a virtue rather than a sin.
Everyone is worked about the cheating Astronomer execs, but they weren't the only ones embarrassed on the Coldplay kiss cam:
In a completely unrelated move, President Trump signed an executive order defining the word "pertinent" as "anything that does not mention the President."
Maybe. Then again, it could be Biden's fault. 🙄
"You can’t straddle Trump," is true both figuratively and literally.
Will the committee look more favorably on this nomination, coming as it does from a man with outstanding warrants for crimes against humanity?
Especially when the nomination comes from someone with outstanding warrants from the ICC for crimes against humanity. What more could the Nobel Committee ask for?
Just curious. Did Netanyahu nominate him for bombing Iran, or for his plan to ethnically cleanse Gaza and turn it into a resort?
Marjorie Taylor Greene now demanding Trump annex Greenland and secure their supply of Kryptonite to protected us against super immigrants.
You'll go broke betting this country couldn't get stupider.
Just arrest a few senators the day of the vote. Problem solved.
Matthew Kacsmaryk is pick 2.
When it comes to not understanding tariffs, no one tops Navarro.
Now that I've indulged my sarcastic urges, I'll give the serious answer. It's a symbolic show of force. The location was chosen because the Mexican consulate is located across the street from the park.
1. DHS Answer: We have credible intelligence that dangerous criminal illegal aliens are in the park. 2. Really Answer: We figured it was a good place to round up folks with brown skin.
She'll likely be fired because her DoJ superiors handed her a shit sandwich that she couldn't make appetizing to the judge.
Actually, that probably would be a MAGA's last thought.
Sending Noem to make sure any undocumented flood victims are detained.
So it's finally over. Diddy was convicted on federal prostitution charges. One question remains. How much Trump coin does he need to buy to ensure his pardon?
I have every confidence that Fox News will let's us know how jobs losses under Trump are Biden's fault.
Stephen Miller was eager to show off his new camp for the boss.
She wants to be Kristi Noem when she grows up.
The president seemed a little disappointed on his tour today:
Leopards ate her face. Who could have predicted?
That sums up the situation as accurately as is possible.
Come on. Reyes can't be that bad. It's not like he has...I don't know...like 34 felonies or something.
CACO
Everyone knows it was leaked by Robo Joe. The proof is in copies of Hillary's emails hidden on Hunter's laptop.
Whenever I see Emil Bove, my first thought is, "I aways thought it would be Clemenza."
Socialist lead in NY, and MAGA is all:
Is it fair to characterize the statement as false if Trump doesn't actually know what "obliterated" means?
