And you can't spell "slaughter" without "laughter ".
Software Developer and QA Analyst. Raconteur. Unabashedly queer. Neurodivergent. Wiccan. Lower-leg amputee. Vermonter. She/her.
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And you can't spell "slaughter" without "laughter ".
Isn't that pretty much all beaches, though?
Man does not look a day over 50.
"I'm not Hawkeye, you dicks!"
The cat in the doorway: "Wow! DoorDash chicken every day??"
They would probably put a countdown clock into every chyron (and the website!), every day until it happens, just like they do for counting down to kickoff on Super Bowl Sunday.
I have heard it described that men view women as vending machines into which kindness coins are placed until sex falls out.
Quatto?
It's Rudy. He was trying to solicit a prostitute.
Wasn't this from 2022 or 2023?
5As were always my favorite.
It's not delivery. It's Djordi.
Household chemicals, you say? Sure, sure. And I went disco dancing with Elvis last Saturday night.
Porkchop sandwiches!
He's just spending (more than) the long weekend golfing at one of his resorts. Though he golfs more weekends than not. Ignore the social media chatter. It's much ado about nothing.
When it finally happens, I want it confirmed sixty different ways from Sunday, as it were, so that there is no misinformation, disinformation, or equivocation about it.
When it finally happens, I want it confirmed sixty different ways from Sunday, as it were, so that there is no misinformation, disinformation, or equivocation about it.
Golfing for the long weekend. Like almost every other weekend.
I spent all four years of high school in band and drama. Got the requisite badges for my school letter, but no traditional jacket to put it on.
He golfs quite nearly as much as he lies, so that's a LOT!
Given the holiday weekend, he's likely just going to be golfing at one of his properties. Though he tends to golf most weekends. He's the golfingest person ever to sit behind the Resolute Desk.
When it finally happens, I want it confirmed sixty different ways from Sunday, as it were, so that there is no misinformation, disinformation, or equivocation about it.
The government needs the People. However, the People do not need the government.
My stomach after eating Taco Bell.
Though not written by Babbitt, I thought the current ear-grating fascist anthem is "Try That in a Small Town".
Ashli Babbitt got exactly what she deserved on Jan 6th 2021. She doesn't deserve military honors at her funeral. She deserves to be buried in an unmarked grave like the traitor she was.
Trump has "decorated" the Oval Office in tacky, cheap, golden crap. He's not wearing a tie nearly as much. While not a requirement for the position, its absence is noticeable. How long until he's wearing a rumpled khaki uniform with gold-braid epaulettes, dripping with fake medals and ribbons?
Ratfuck Junior is certainly not someone who is qualified to speak on matters of childhood health (or health at all). Ratfuck Junior's aunt, Rosemary Kennedy (sister of JFK and RFK Sr) was developmentally delayed, and her father (Joseph Kennedy) had her lobotomized in 1941.
That's the only way to eat a peach!
I open the coat closet by the front door. Oh! There's a Supreme Court Justice. Out for a walk, and noticed hiding in a tree: a Supreme Court Justice. Couldn't play 4-on-4 basketball at the park. We were short one Supreme Court Justice.
Melania's intelligence is as artificial as her Botox, breast implants, and lip fillers. She can barely read and speak English. She *hated* being First Lady the first go-round, and really didn't want to do it again.
I hope it's not the radioactive shrimp from Wal-Mart.
Holy hell. Paging Badge502!
They very likely have negative bitches. A dearth of bitches. Bitch debt.
"Can you fly, Bobby?"
And making the hunt accessible by public transit? *chef's kiss*
What are the other two?
A joke doesn't become a Dad Joke until it is fully groan.
What's to stop the feds from just ignoring Judge Xinis's order, and having ICE snatch Garcia the next time he goes grocery shopping?
I have, undoubtedly, been such an example in countless conversations over the decades.
I was being literal, not figurative.
The third-party voters and Gaza-against-Kamala voters each deserve to be sharted upon by someone who has eaten Taco Bell, every remaining day of their self-righteous lives.
> "The general is for voting AGAINST the other party." It's sad how many people conveniently ignored that fact in 2024.
What do you think of Pritzker/Walz or Pritzker/Shapiro pairings?
For generations to come. And then some more.
4 years ago Seth told us alllllllll about this liar and how he is really #McGrifty - lets remind ourselves
"The Rock". Cage & Connery. My grandparents were living in SF at the time that was being filmed. Some of the Hummer vs yellow sports car chase was filmed on their street. Grandma sent photos of the vehicles and Cage & Connery's stunt doubles.
Nobody looks particularly enthused to be in the same room as Blump.
That movie would not be as good as it is without John Malkovich.
How much can they out-steroid each other?
Where everybody knows your name (for all the wrong reasons)!
Double your pleasure. Double your fun. Anti-fascist gum!
His signature appears to say "Donold I Summmp".
Crispety, crunchety, peanut buttery! Oh wait, that's Butterfinger.
Ah, getting a group rate.
"I get high with a little help from my friends."
It'll be a swingin' good time! 🎺
My late grandfather did as well. Grandma used to run and open every window she could ("Good Lord, Dick! Why must you eat that horrible, foul thing?"), even in the dead of winter, when grandpa brought out his slab of limburger.
Blue goat cheese is SO good! There's a number of small dairies here in Vermont that make it. Just absolutely 🤤.
I know. All we end up with is a milkshake.
What dye is cat-safe?
I think Trey & Matt should bring back Cartman's infamous song from the first movie about Kyle's mom, but update the lyrics and cameo appearances to instead reflect Kristi Noem.
Yes.
*lights clove cigarette* Sex dungeon.
AIPAC are equal-opportunity assholes. No matter if you have an R or a D after your name, they'll pay you to listen to what they say. Kind of like a timeshare presentation, but far, far worse.
Fat stacks of wax!
A pool spray means a brief opportunity for the traveling press pool (and/or on-location correspondents) to take photos of the dignitaries in attendance. Though there's nothing dignified about Blump.
Predictable plots? Predictable plotz.
"Heckuva job, Brownie."
I don't know what any of that is, but I would at least give it a try.
Half-Life 3 sure looks weird.
I thought it was yet another remake of "IT": a big clown who harms children.
During the ride, he probably blabbed about The Beast's classified build and capabilities.
That certainly brings a whole new meaning to "fuck the police".
Had he missed and fallen down the stairs, on video, someone would absolutely have to insert the drum break from Phil Collins's "In The Air Tonight".
Newsom's social media team is totally crushing it lately. It's the kind of messaging that the DNC needs leading up to the midterms and throughout the 2028 cycle.
Normally, I find sautéed onions to be weird and slimy, but I'll eat them on a cheesesteak.
Right? I could go for an absolute overstuffed Philly cheesesteak today. With grilled onions and peppers, and sharp Vermont cheddar. Or Cheez Whiz. I'm not picky.
I worry about my parents, now both in early 70s. My brother and I are nearby enough to tell them "That's a scam. Ignore it. Don't click on any links." but time marches on.
My grandfather had dementia & my nana (other side of family) has Alzheimer's. It's rough & heartbreaking. I'll never joke about it. For Trump, the media will always sanewash him & make excuses. Reagan's decline was not well known at the time b/c of no internet yet & 24 hr news cycle in its infancy.
His social media team is doing great with the trolling. It's about time we gave some back to Creamsicle Caligula.
Breaking on MSNBC: President Obama and former attorney general Eric Holder held a virtual call with Texas Democrats today, thanking them for blocking state Republicans' gerrymandering efforts.
I'm surprised that the "invite" didn't say 'do the needful' somewhere in it.
A salt, cherry peppers, shredded lettuce, tomatoes, provolone, genoa salami, capicola, and just a dash of oregano.
"You can take mah guns when you pry them from mah cold, dead ... well, OK, there you go."
With the current administration, no state is safe. Not for personal safety, nor for votes.
The situation in Gaza will not change as long as the state of Israel exists. US government will never stop supporting Israel, unfortunately. As long as we lust for Middle East oil & oil lobbyists & AIPAC buy our politicians of both parties. Been propping them up since the 1970s. Fuck them too.