Mmmmm. Nice — and appropriate — use of —
Drawing on my fine command of language, I said nothing except, "I have friends everywhere." (Statements of fact here are just as likely to be satire. Don't be a fool—check your sources.)
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Mmmmm. Nice — and appropriate — use of —
Citizens Unite!
You get what you get (from the current administration) and you don't get upset.
If you have to check your brain at the door, you are entering a cult, not a church.
Similar to the Greendale Community College logo...
It sucks to work in the NA-TIO-NAL GUARD! You don't get paid in the NA-TIO-NAL GUARD! You're just picking up trash As the economy crashed You'd much rather be home all day!
He's gonna brag about these illegal terrifs to the grave, and let JD have to deal with refunding them all.
Colbert never had to worry about his future. The Capitulation Broadcast Service should be worried about their future, though.
"The Public Library Strikes Back"
Hundreds of Beavers!
Even if he apologizes to Putin?
Da Bones!
I'm sure Dear Leader "won" whatever he was playing.
Google Lens will only identify and translate the top line of this as "God's day." I'm wondering if anyone fluent in Arabic knows what this whole image honestly says.
And if he must have emergency amputation of his feet for necrosis, he will be known as Donald Stump.
Alcoholic octogenarian puts car mistakenly into reverse, backs into stationary object, claims "struck from behind" from hospital bed.
Those who do not learn from history are doomed to repeat it, poorly.
We'd get better national health care if it was required that only the surgeon general and head of NIH were permitted to diagnose, treat, and perform life-saving care for POTUS.
But forging a signature convincingly is easier upside-down. Or is that umop-apisdn?
The difference between intimate apparel and a swim suit also comes down to consent.
Never once.
"It is in our power to have no opinion about a thing, and not to be disturbed in our soul; for things themselves have no natural power to form our judgements." —Marcus Aurelius, Meditations, Book 6
A self-fulfilling prophecy.
That's his parent's house. He runs it from the basement.
Not just a doctor. Many people are saying it. All the best people. They come up to me, big men, strong men, with tears in their eyes, and they tell me they gotta cut loose. Foot loose. Both feet, perhaps.
It's been nice knowing them. Actually carpooled with the Walgreens to elementary school back in the day.
Boss makes a dollar, I make a dime. That's why I do updates On company time.
Trump won't live another 12 months, but I'm fearful of the rest of the lineup behind him to a similar degree. He's just the useful idiot being played like a cheap banjo by monied interests and crypto bros.
Socialized vegetables, all because of some problem with dessert!
I'm eagerly awaiting Dear Leader touring an industrial lubricant facility.
We live in a Nepocracy.
He's going to then have the Air Force march, followed by the Marines, Coast Guard, Space Force, and in the end, DHS and ICE.
You are a much bigger man than Trump. And that's no small thing.
And yet she will do nothing. Again.
This gives me such a doubleplusungood bellyfeel.
Cue the opening scene of "Idiocracy".
Nobody ever said "Fuck da Firefighters" for a reason.
Just one score shy of a 21-gun salute.
I don't like what we've become, and we should be ashamed of ourselves.
May need to cut down on those fabulous thigh-high white lifting boots, too.
"I believe their children are our future. Treat them bad and deport them right away. Show them all the hate that you all have inside. Send them to a cell in Africa to make it harder. Let the children's suffering define how we want to be..."
No butterfly feels like they can be responsible for a "butterfly effect" on history.
I hate Illinois Nazis!
(Asking for a friend?)
She is just one score away from having had a twenty-one gun salute anyway.
Game recognizes game.
"Second verse, same as the first, a little bit dumber and a little bit worse..."
"If the facts are against you, argue the law. If the law is against you, argue the facts. If the law and the facts are against you, propound on the table and yell like hell." —Not quite Carl Sandburg
Agreed: "My opinions about vaccines are irrelevant," he said in response to the question from Democratic Rep. Mark Pocan of Wisconsin during the House Appropriations Committee hearing. "I don't want to seem like I'm being evasive, but I don't think people should be taking medical advice from me."
I find your comic REALLY clever.
"Live your life like the USA does not deserve you."
We are living in a post-fact society. He didn't name it Fact Social. It's the Truth. And it shall not be questioned. The Emperor has no facts.
It's okay, they'll be powered by "clean coal".
Realizing that most young people are no longer taught to read or write cursive, the latest corporate rebranding I'm sure will be no cause for concern.
Call up the Nat-C-ional Guard!
s/FIRST/GRIFT/
A cancerous grift has metastasized in the beltway.
It's Nationalist Christians (Nat-Cs), to be pedantic. They have no logic, only truthiness.
Miss you, dude.
Since it's "Woke" to teach cursive, get a load of this new logo just announced...
That's fair. I knew he wasn't right just by looking at him, too.
She is just one score away from having had a twenty-one gun salute anyway.
It's such a tragediegh.
It's easier than covering actual news. "Look over there, at the distraction!"
Nat-Cs don't understand the 2A in the same way they don't understand their own Bibles.
Elwood Blues is known by the Trump administration to be a member of MS13, as identified by the indisputable tattoos on his hand, and will be deported to a facility in Chad this week.
"If you've got time to be fascist, you've got time to pick up trash-ist."
The resemblance to Butthead is stunning. And they look the same, too.
Now why would NBC do such a silly thing? It's time for A Closer Look. I bet after that, it will make Amber say What? We should just Leave 'Em Alone! Things sure were better Back In My Day.
What is this, The Onion barrel?
Nothing is left to chew.
The National Gaud on full display.
"All animals are equal, but some animals are more equal than others." —George Orwell, "Animal Farm"
It's actually a diaper to catch the mess of their brains leaking out of their heads.
So funny that Trump thinks Wichita Falls and El Paso would be the big blue bastions in Texas ...
Trump has always known that he's not smart. But he's clever and tenacious, a dangerous combination. Tenacious DJT.
"I think you all know that I've always felt the nine most terrifying words in the English language are: I'm from the Government, and I'm here to help." —Ronald Reagan
"Power corrupts. Absolute power corrupts absolutely. But it rocks absolutely, too." —[despair.com]
The Picture of Dorian Grey, incarnate.
Because of the "inflammation" (wink)
Promises made, promises kept! What an honorable man!
Considerable Cajones.
Heyyyy Abbot! Stop being such an authoritarian enabler!
"Those who would give up essential Liberty, to purchase a little temporary Safety, deserve neither Liberty nor Safety." —Benjamin Franklin
I'm waiting for another gushing review of Russian grocery stores from JD, like the one we got from Tucker.
Got any bubble gum?
They're in a cultural Ty with Beanie Babies.
What is the biggest challenge of making the Fox Trot family remain culturally relevant through several decades now? And thanks for managing it.
Amen, Amend.
Bruce's Law: prov. All unaccountable organizations are corrupt. P.S. Trump is now secretly hoping he dies of congestive heart failure before the Epstein Files are finally released. His soul will wind up in a spiritual burn bag either way.
Chalk up another idiotic use of resources by the thought police.
